there’s some days where she’ll want to talk to me, follow my accounts, say things to me, and then call me an annoying b*tch.

she’s nice in public, i’m assuming so others don’t think she’s mean, but what i mainly don’t understand is why she talks to me since she hates me so much and did nothing but harm me.

  • cheese_greater@lemmy.world
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    20 hours ago

    Don’t engage with people like that. This is one area you must be selfish and refuse to deal with others who bring you down, regardless of their reason. You can’t burn yourself up to keep others warm and expect to thrive and feel decently.

    Just let them know you cant talk to people who make you feel like crap and unpredictably and block them so they can’t impose further. Try not to worry about why or empathizing because you need to focus on keeping your ship afloat and house in order and do that requires you to respect yourself by not harming yourself and exposing yourself to toxic others. Thats a good way to become distrustful and self-sabatoging if you allow people like that into your sanctum of influence. Your life and network are a temple, don’t let vandals and thieves and vampires in. Keep your enemies/toxicity far away, try to learn from them at a distance in an objective way but do not rely on them to necessarily improve or feel better.

    I’ve made a practice of this for myself (doesnt matter if its family or friends or otherwise) and I’ve definitely been on the receiving end and today I understand why and everyone is honestly better off for it. Your time is not charity and you are not a punching bag, try to act thusly