• Wasweissich@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      4
      ·
      9 months ago

      100% one of my employees married at 40 and got divorced at 45 life happens no matter the age. If you cannot work on yourself with your spouse and vis a vis you are fucked anyway at whatever age

    • lunarul@lemmy.world
      link
      fedilink
      arrow-up
      2
      arrow-down
      1
      ·
      9 months ago

      Two reasons to wait:

      • people in their early 20s are more likely to change dramatically later, so definitely more of a gamble at that age
      • because it’s a gamble, you should already be well prepared for life on your own before doing it; that gives you a solid fallback in case things don’t work out
      • Wasweissich@lemmy.world
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        9 months ago

        I think overcomming obstacles growing as people together is an experience and bonding I would have never liked to miss. Going from a broke ass Teenager to now was a wild trip and my wife was there the whole time. She changed and I changed but we never changed apart because we communicated about our inner selves

        • lunarul@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          edit-2
          9 months ago

          But that’s where the gamble is. You changed together and it worked out. Others grow apart through no fault of their own and despite their desire to keep things working, they just don’t want the same things anymore. Your and my experience are the lucky ones.

      • dudinax@programming.dev
        link
        fedilink
        arrow-up
        1
        ·
        9 months ago

        And on the flip side you might plan out your life to begin when you’re thirty, wait until youre wise and wealthy, then suddenly die.

        • lunarul@lemmy.world
          link
          fedilink
          arrow-up
          1
          ·
          9 months ago

          If you live somewhere where life expectancy is close enough to 30 to make that eventuality part of your life choices, then go ahead and marry as a teenager. Don’t even wait for 20, marry at 16.

          • dudinax@programming.dev
            link
            fedilink
            arrow-up
            1
            ·
            9 months ago

            Likewise, if you live in a place where nobody dies before they reach their life expectancy, waiting might be a good idea.

            • lunarul@lemmy.world
              link
              fedilink
              arrow-up
              1
              ·
              edit-2
              9 months ago

              Life expectancy is the age most people live to. Some live less, some live more. You shouldn’t make plans heavily counting on one of those exceptions. Don’t hurry up to do things just in case you’re one of the ones who live less, don’t delay things too long because you might live to 120.

              Planning for living 30 years only makes sense in a place where most people don’t live over that.