miz_elektro

Not a personal website, but I’m currently working on my portfolio site for when it’s time to find a job. I’m in school for software development. I’ve made websites using Wordpress templates and very basic html/css long before but now I’m actually trying to code mine from scratch with html/css/js now that I’ve learned enough in school. It is really fun, especially when you find cool tricks and they work!

Just got the news last week that my dad, who was diagnosed with Pancreatic cancer in October, might have 5-7 months left. Plus my mom is slowly dying from COPD. I’m trying to stay positive and spend what might be the last Christmas we get with them. But to say I’m not feeling the happy new year vibes is an understatement. Only death and more depression coming in 2024.

A horror movie called It’s Alive. I was 5 years old. My mom would rent horror movies without checking the ratings and I’d watch them. Even after this I always loved horror and never had nightmares or anything. But, I rewatched It’s Alive a few years ago and it is definitely not for kids… But honestly the craziest thing my mom rented was The Toxic Avenger, when I was maybe 10. She never saw it herself it so still has no idea what she allowed me to watch at a young age!

I found out the difference between just normal dislike and phobias a few years ago. I dislike insects and they make me jumpy but I wasn’t terrified of any of them, even spiders. Until I had an encounter with giant carpenter ants, both the normal ones and the ones with wings.

I was living in my RV and apparently it was their nesting season, and I come from a different province and normally never see large ants like these. I kept finding them everywhere in my trailer, these giant ants, like I’d open a drawer and pull out a dish cloth and one would be underneath it. I was crying hysterically and shaking and I would rather have died than come across another one. It went on for about 3 days, I barely slept because the fuckers were crawling all over the ceiling and walls at night.

I went and picked up ant killer spray and went scorched earth on them. Within a day there were dozens of dead ones inside the trailer and probably thousands outside in the gravel. It was crazy. Neighbouring campers had these ants too, I guess it was normal nesting season there and no one worried about it much. They started to comment that the ants were disappearing earlier. I didn’t tell them it was me lol. But yeah, I have a phobia I wasn’t expecting and I lose my shit when I see them to this day.

I’m very sure I’ll be able to contribute to this conversation at the end of the semester. I have an Organizational Behavior class and the teacher is a prick, narcissist and a bully. Treating us adults like we are misbehaving children and gaslighting us every class.

It’s interesting how it affects people differently. When I lost my sense of smell with COVID, bad smells were the last to return. I could smell everything else but couldn’t smell bathroom smells, eggs, skunk, or weed (debatable if the last one is bad or not, but either way it was gone). It was nice, I was hoping to only smell nice things forever, but it came back.