my bf is poly and already has a bf, so he doesn’t want to initiate anything with me. he doesn’t wanna call nor hang out, and he always texts very dry. he’s nice, but i don’t feel loved.

I’m not doing well mentally though. my gf already ignores me (she and i are poly too) and i feel like i will die if he breaks up (though i clearly won’t die)

  • Porto881@lemmy.world
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    21 hours ago

    Posts like these have taught me to run for the hills the second someone mentions being “poly.”

    • socialjusticewizard@sh.itjust.works
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      21 hours ago

      It works for some people but everything i ever hear just sounds so high maintenance.

      Then again, the people in comfortable stable poly relationships probably don’t post much about it online

    • you_are_dust@lemm.ee
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      20 hours ago

      This is entirely anecdotal, but everyone that I have ever spoken to in real life that was poly seemed to be poly because the original relationship was failing. They were no longer getting any attention or affection from their partner and instead of moving on, decided the way forward was to add more people so that they could get the attention they weren’t getting from the original partner. I met a woman on a dating app a few years ago that was looking for a boyfriend despite having a husband and a boyfriend already. One day she was texting me that she was bored and lonely. Her husband and boyfriend were both in the same room with her but everyone was ignoring each other on their phones. Crazy stuff. I’m sure some people are able to make those situations successful, but it’s gotta be a minority of attempts.

      • andros_rex@lemmy.world
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        5 hours ago

        My ex used poly as a way to get me to help him find the next bang maid.

        I’ve never seen healthy poly in practice.