• GamersOfTheWorld [he/him, any]@hexbear.net
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    22 days ago

    I dress up as Stalin for Halloween.

    I go to the various houses (petite bourgeoisie kulak liberals) and knock on their door.

    I make my demand simple. “Trick or treat, lib.”

    They say they’ll give me candy, but only a bagful

    This is where it gets interesting.

    I pull out a comically large burlap sack (each thread was handwoven by a random seamstress in Dudinka) and take all of the candy.

    I then denounce them for their reactionary offerings (licorice is rooted in Anglo-Saxon imperialism, don’t @ me) and then give them a single slap across the face.

    They then cry.

    I am directly responsible for multiple anti-communist laws in my area.