I’ve heard several stories about couples that suddenly stop having sex, start snapping at each other for stupid bs, your girlfriend who was so sweet and supporting becomes her mother, a raging, yelling psychopath, looking for excuses to be passive aggressive, inviting her friends back home when all you want to do is rest after your workday, your boyfriend, so passionate about you is suddenly cold towards you and wants to be left alone. Before having a child you were inseparable, now it’s like you hate each other and rant about your loved one with your friends…
I couldn’t survive such a radical personality change.
Does this phase eventually runs its course?
How do you find the mental fortitude to ignore the stupid bs your partner does or says?
How would you describe love to your partner a year after having a baby?
Is there any way to know if you and your partner are going to make it and remain a couple after having a child?
I run pretty hot usually, good sex drive, but nursing absolutely dampened that down to below zero. Plus sex is frightening after birth. Plus having kids hanging on you all the time can certainly make you long for some space with nobody touching you, and a guy asking for sex on top of that can feel like an obligation. Again - I am saying this as someone who literally has sex every day most of the time, and pregnancy made sex feel even better. Nursing killed my sex drive. YES it passes, assuming your kids are healthy, they are easier over time, and eventually even somewhat helpful. Once that babyhood was over, I’d say they were stressful in the way a second job is - it’s just more of everything.
Overall I would say kids were good for the relationship, we stayed together longer and happier because of them. My ex was helpful as a dad, wanted kids, as I did. Kids are hands down the best work I’ve done in my life, nothing else comes close. But it is stressful as fuck, yes. Especially at the start.