I wonder what causes people who once thought they’d spend their life together to not want to do that anymore.

Has your partner change? Or did they not change when you expected them to? Have you changed?

Have you not noticed each others’ flaws when love was young and the pink glasses still worked and only discovered them later?

And what can your experience teach us about our own relationships?

    • peoplebeproblems@midwest.socialEnglish
      13·
      15 hours ago

      Let’s start with the fact that we met at 14. This is important because my attraction to her was because she was (and still is) incredibly hot. 100lbs, hourglass, eyes that made me melt.

      Well, all four years of highschool I was tutoring her through her remedial classes. She just barely graduated. As always though, thinking with your dick gets you in trouble.

      I helped her start work on a two year degree she had a pell grant and scholarship for - that she couldn’t finish. Which of course she blamed on me because I was “too involved in my own education.”

      She questioned the necessity of vaccines for a long time. Thankfully I got her opinion changed before we had a kid.

      I remember when we first started dating she told me I “didnt have to be so smarty all the time.” I asked her what she meant and she said “well, have you tried like not thinking or learning everything you want to know?”

      I felt bad for her. She couldn’t stand most jobs. I had this feeling I needed to be with her because she really had a dismal future. So I married her. I mean, come on, she’s hot. Maybe she can cook (she couldn’t cook well), or doesn’t mind chores, and she can be a little supportive. Plus, I would make enough that she wouldn’t need to work. And she really wanted to be a stay at home mom. Worked for me.

      She couldn’t do the stay at home mom. She hated that “I got to work a job I liked” and she “had to be responsible.”

      Fast forward a bit. She gets a job. She messes around with her boss, meets a customer has a “one time thing” with him. I’m crushed beyond belief. COVID comes around. I feel terrible about the potential for divorcing her. We try to work it out, im suspicious about the amount of time she spends with other men, she convinces me I’m too controlling. I discover her sexting nudes n stuff 3 years after the affair and she admits to it being the same guy (who I never found out who it was). She finally gets a job when I decide to divorce, but it comes with no benefits. Because she doesn’t want to work full or part time.

      There’s more, but honestly I’m kind of done for now lol.

      • teamevil@lemmy.world
        6·
        15 hours ago

        Makes SOOOO much more sense being you met her @ 14. We all could have fallen into that trap.

        Ooofff…no matter how hot they are, someone is tired of putting up with their shit. (They is genderless, men are nuts too)

        She unfortunately was not smart enough to understand consequences of fuck around finding out.

        I as a fellow old fuck absolutely understand the self-imposed obligation…but just remember, you can’t always be Captain Save-a-ho. I am really hoping I’ve finally figured that out myself.