It’s just, too much, so much bad and evil happening and I can’t take it, nor can I look away.
I use these platforms to distract from the gnawing constant loneliness I feel that never goes away.
I can’t spend more than 5 minutes without a video playing or checking some kind of media to fill the void.
I’m feeling so suicidal nowadays, but I’m stuck in this existence for the time being.
its a sucky time for sure. Alls you can do is what you can do and don’t do what you think should not be done. Try to be the best you can be and try not to let the obvious future get you down. Whats funny to me is my personal circumstance would certainly make things better if they were better in a way but ultimately I could not be happy as the world is even if I was rich. The problem is how we are doing things. Our society itself would need to be more equitable overall for me to be happy no matter where I fell in it.
As I said elsewhere, get off even Lemmy. Do something physical, even if it’s just cleaning up some. As someone who spends most of his time in front of a monitor, don’t spend most of your time in front of a monitor if you can help it. I still get up regularly, stretch, get water, wander around. We weren’t made for this.
Start changing your diet here:
yeah this place rocks when you block all political communities and news
No, it doesn’t. This place becomes barely tolerable once you spend a completely unreasonable amount of time and effort curating toxicity out of your feed. I just don’t think there’s fixing it when it’s a foundational problem. It’s tribalism, grandstanding, virtue signaling, groupthink, and outrage. It’s not “let’s explore an idea” but rather “look at everything that’s wrong with the world and how these people are the problem.”
It’s a self-selected group of people loosely tied together by the mutual hatred of an outgroup. That’s the only common thread.
Contrasting the two discussion-based platforms I spend my time on and how one just works and the other is Lemmy, I’ve come to the conclusion that the only way to build a platform like this that the users don’t regret having gone to is by having it paywalled behind a monthly subscription and making indecency a ban-worthy offense - and actually enforcing it. When it’s a free-for-all like this, there’s no incentive to not shit where you eat.
So much fucking yes.
I then feel like I’m missing out on important stuff, but I guess you’re right.
What are you going to do with the important stuff?
Not sure, understand the world around me? Understand why prices are going up or if I should be concerned about war in my area.
If you’re making good use of the information, then it’s good to consume it.
I have Ukraine. Gaza, Trump and Musk blocked, not because I don’t care about them but because I can’t affect them in any way whatsoever aside from feeling shitty at being more personally aware of the atrocities of the world.
You can always vote
What makes you think I don’t vote?
The fact that you said you can’t affect them in any way whatsoever aside from feeling shitty at being more personally aware of the atrocities of the world.
Voting is compulsory in my country. The people I’ve voted for have never won any power to affect things. Our (like many countries) media is essentially bought out acting as a PR wing for the wealthy,
Maybe you should vote for someone with a chance of victory.
You can’t always vote, elections usually only occur once or twice a year.
Yes but it’s better to decide who you support well in advance to ensure you aren’t swept by campaigns. It’s the whole reason Trump won in 2024. People chose to believe his campaign instead of doing research on him.
Do you feel at all disconnected from what is going on in the world?
Nope, enough still comes through. It’s not like I’m not aware of these things I just don’t want to be bombarded with them.
When you realise your view of the world is already narrow because of the window you choose to view it, a few quality of life filters are not going to make that window any smaller, just less covered in shit.
I guess so.
Im not sure humans were designed to know every horrible thing thats is happening everyday, all day, all over the world.
Youre knowing about it cant really change it from happening, can it?
Let yourself rest from the strife
Yeah, I’ll start working on a blocklist here, but it’s just everywhere online, places where it’s shoved down your throat.
No yeah it is everywhere. My partner watched the Knicks basketball game last night… and like, I went to bed so I didnt have to hear the google AI commercial that literally just walked you through its answering of basketball questions. I wanted to vomit so I went to bed.
My favorite cope is walking away. I do wish you could find a way into nature, and to find meaning in nature. Everyone is different obvs. but this has been so helpful for me in grounding me from the horrors of humanity. Id be dead without the trees and wildlife, always there, to ground me.
I’ve spent a lot of this week blocking news communities and anything related to politics, ongoing conflicts, places that hate me because of where I live, and just anything that puts me in a mood.
It’s been getting quite slow on my front page as a result.
If I want to be pissed off and anxious about things outside my control, I have another account on a different instance. I used to be a prolific commenter but since I made this account I’ve been using the other one less and less. It just gets me down.
Block things. You won’t regret it.
I would advise finding a hobby that’s not in front of a computer. Try doing stuff with your hands or volunteering if you can.
I’m not the right language to volunteer, I also have little interest in society where I live, and hobbies I enjoy are unobtainable and expensive.
wdym you’re not the right language to volunteer? Why do you have little interest in society where you live?
That’s a pretty bleak view man, there’s plenty of cheap hobbies. walking and reading for example.
Very lonely hobbies, the former leaving a lot of time to be stuck in your own head.
Join a walking group or book club.
Go screen free and maybe spend some time rolling this over your mind. I got stuck for all of early spring on what I cant do… until I mulled it over to what I can.
I have spent decades in my mine, that’s part of why I do it, so I can get out of my mind.
Reading? do you like to read? Ive picked up reading more this last year or so, and Ive really come to like it as a different form of escape and connection. Even if its just reading for a few mins. Maybe it something you dont enjoy, but if you place a book out in your sight, maybe next to whatever you use for social medias, you might choose eventually to pick that up instead?
I been full mad at my phone often enough, for simialar stuggles, and I got so mad I started reading lol. It was easier when I put access to books front and center
Life really is just one big cope. Its absurd, but im glad youre here trying
I see. How about trying some cheaper hobbies and, if you hate them, you’re only out a little bit of money. I got into farming by growing plants on my balcony as a small hobby. It doesn’t pay the bills by I enjoy (most of) it, I use my hands, and connect with nature. I also used to like doing small woodworking projects for the same using-my-hands reason. Amateur radio might be another one to look at (entry is cheap but it can be a money pit if you get really into it)
Nature and plants are my favorite too. Its very cheap, and hiking only cost travel to outside. Bird watching is a great way I find to ground myself. Then bug watch, and plant watch. The only app I grant location data is the Merlin app. Ive learned so many birds using it. Theres an app Picture This that helps identify plants, and learning about the living things around us, really is… it lowers my blood pressure anyway.
The opposite of social media is nature imo. Its a connection long standing and worth noticing.
Adjust your filters to cut out the garbage that makes you feel bad, anxious, or like you should be doing something.
Find things that you want to engage with, but control the dosage. Limit simulations to one at a time. Explore hobbies, interests, people, and situations. Reinforce what makes you feel good. Keep a log of the good things and reference it when you can’t remember what’s good anymore.
Know that this too shall pass, life is interesting, and things will be OK even if it’s not today.
Music.
I get like this, and put on music, full albums as of late, because then I can set my phone down and wander.
Yesterday I was restless and put on Jesse Welles and went out into my garden to pick bugs off my lemon tree. Ended up weeding my garden after, spending a few hours out there. Felt whole afterwards.
I don’t feel like I have any privacy on my balcony and I hate being observed when I’m doing private things. Also my cat can’t go on the balcony and that makes me never go out.
ooooooo.
I struggle with this too. I dont like to be observed so it will keep me from my own yard. I have to time when I do any work in thd front, to when I think my neighbors are all busy. Its fuckin weird of me, and I totally get what you mean.
Ive been working on it. I noticed my neighbors dont give af about it, and really I am trying to figure out why I care who sees me. I think I fear judgment. Im working on it. I can only take my bike out early or late, never in the middle of the day for the same reason. Also something Im working on, this being a bit easier than working in my front yard.
Keep mulling over solutions your comfortable with. Dont need anything to just, think. Im glad you have kitty company, at least :)
…and you can put music on and do whatever, wander round your spot and fiddle with … anything project or non project you want to. I just use music to get away from my phone/screen when its really bringing me down. Its connection. I sing to my cats. lol sing to ur cat ;)
Wonderful day!
I am sorry… to know that…, dear @KyuubiNoKitsune@lemmy.blahaj.zone …
Oh! Have you considered art, actual hobby, or visiting local galleries/restaurants/events around in your town or farther, or travelling around the globe?
Have you checked out some art related to Stoicism? For example, a start may be translations:
Do you think you are the only one this has happened to? Are you amazed to find that even with such extensive travel, to so many varied locales, you have not managed to shake off gloom and heaviness from your mind? As if that were a new experience! You must change the mind, not the venue. Though you cross the sea, though “lands and cities drop away,” as our poet Virgil says, still your faults will follow you wherever you go…
Bring an accusation against yourself, as stringently as you can. Then conduct the investigation. Take the role of the accuser first, then the judge, and let that of the advocate come last. Offend yourself sometimes! Farewell.
Source (Letters On Ethics To Lucilius by Seneca…) [4 BC - 65 AD]
A man can be himself only so long as he is alone; and if he does not love solitude, he will not love freedom; for it is only when he is alone that he is really free." ~ Arthur Schopenhauer
-–
Our language has wisely sensed these two sides of man’s being alone. It has created the word “loneliness” to express the pain of being alone. And it has created the word “solitude” to express the glory of being alone. ~ Paul Tillich
So, here goes: one last letter now
One last attempt to make sense
Who have I been writing to? I’m not sure anymore
What have I been trying to accomplish?~ A Broken Jar - La Dispute
Everything where I live is expensive and unavailable. So I don’t do anything anymore besides sleep, work and distract.
Have you considered art? Try drawing or painting. Entry level stuff is dirt cheap and creative endeavors are a great way to get all the ick out of your brain.
Edit: or writing? Perhaps poetry, maybe try to write a song or a story, or a song that tells a story.
So, you’ve already made your choice, then?
Yup, woke up this morning and chose depression, thanks!
No you didn’t, but depression can make a lot of choices for you and it’s difficult to see the options around you that you have until you force yourself to do something different.
Idk where you live but I am willing to bet there’s a food out reach program looking for volunteers within 25 miles unless you live In a super rural area.
I know you implied you aren’t up for it earlier but whatever your doing right now is clearly isn’t helping, so maybe something outside your comfort zone?
Humans are social creatures even if youd rather be alone most of the time, like I do, and getting involved In a community mutual aid program really helps others and can help yourself.
You mean people talking about Trump, Trump, and more Trump is a bit of a downer?
I’m somewhat isolated from the shenanigans by geography, so it doesn’t effect me as much, but yeah, that’s entirely reasonable.
I do think looking for something constructive to do with your time is a good idea, some type of craft or hobby.
I don’t think anyone is entirely isolated from the shenanigans by geography.
yeah i really feel for you.
i’m very convinced that any mention of trump should be banned from lemmy (outside the politics communities) because the constant mud-throwing is making me sick.
mud-throwing is necessary to defeat them
Not throwing mud at Trump supporters, throwing mud at anyone you think is a “deeply unserious lib” despite the fact that for every twenty of these people maybe one actually does anything more than the “brunch liberals” they despise so much.
IMHO mud-throwing does nothing to defeat them, i’ve never seen it make a difference
